I often say that I am pursuing the self-care model for fibromyalgia after decades of following the push through model. But what does this mean?
The self-care model of fibromyalgia (and any chronic illness) management is the opposite of the push through model.
Of course, to achieve what we achieve we are pushing through great difficulties. But the self-care model proposes that we prioritise managing symptoms as well as possible.
It is predicated upon the fact that we DESERVE to be treated for our symptoms and that fibromyalgia is TREATABLE. There is no reason for us to have to push through.
I will die on this hill. We can achieve a better quality of life. There are treatments to help us. And we deserve them.
The self-care model of fibromyalgia says that we:
- deserve a better quality of life
- It is attainable (treatment exists, we just don’t know how far we can go)
- Isn’t just for single people with few responsibilities
It’s time to say no to the implication or outright advice to “get on with it” in the absence of practical help. This is what happened to me, I ended up burnt out with worse symptoms.
I argue that taking better care of ourselves makes us more productive and efficient. But more importantly I argue our quality of life is priority one.
The self-care model decreases symptoms, the push through model increases symptoms.
I got to the point where I had to wade through burn out and the symptoms caused and worsened by the push through model before I could even figure out the root of my main symptoms.
This ramps up the nervous system overactivation.
In my resources – blog, YouTube, social media, newsletter and courses – I share all the ways I’ve found that help to give you ideas. To show you what it is like maintaining improvement in amongst life.
Tools like pacing, yoga nidra meditation, breathwork, stretching, pain management plans and more all improve my symptoms, productivity and quality of life.
But when it comes down to it, now that I’ve experienced improvement, I’ll fight hard for my quality of life. And I want that for you. Improvement. Quality of life.
Is remission possible?
Someone in my group recently asked if I think remission is possible. The answer is that I’m not sure. The ones who claim remission (that I have heard of) often haven’t been unwell for very long, didn’t take long to get diagnosis or treatment and don’t have children. They are able to live a life aligned with (a lower) work-life balance.
Perhaps we will always be sensitive.
What does the self-care model look like?
First and foremost it requires us to take charge. Even if we are able to get a doctor who is knowledgeable on fibromyalgia (or other condition), we will require an active involvement. There are many treatment options and a lot of the impact on our symptoms are our daily choices. Including choices the doctor can’t make.
- How much we work
- When we go to bed and get up
- How we eat
- If we drink enough water
- Movement – that we prioritise it but make it fit for our context and purpose
- Enacting our pain management plans
It means creating and following a pain management plan that seeks to be proactive, thereby reducing the nervous system overactivation and the vicious cycle of poor sleep – more pain – more fatigue – poor sleep and on.
Sometimes it means persisting, even without medical support. Even with a supportive doctor at long last, I am still making most of my decisions myself – with her input where medication is concerned.
Where to start?
Do go through this blog, it was designed to share anything that helps me in case it helps you. And I’ve come a long way.
Affiliate notice: Please note that some of my links may be affiliate links. If you make a purchase using one of these links, I may make a small commission at no extra cost to you.
Also check out From Fatigued to Fantastic by Doctor Teitelbaum. And The FibroManual by Doctor Ginevra. These books may feel overwhelming because there are a lot of recommendations, because there is no one-size fits all answer. However, you could go in for the biggest problem area first (sleep?) and then move on.
If you want to bounce some ideas in a supportive group, you can come and join Going Our Own Pace Facebook group, which I run.
